Joseph Coulter, more commonly known as Captain, wants to massage you. But he'll time it. And then you have to reciprocate.

Childhood

Captain grew up in Denton.

Adulthood

Captain is still in Denton.

Massages

Captain is more tactile than normal people, and shows his affection by touching them, rather than looking at them or talking to them. He prefers cuddling to dancing. He is very good at massages, but requests that you reciprocate, even if you think you aren't very good at them.

Partying

Captain parties a lot, usually with Ritch Ludlow.

Never Have I Ever

Captain plays this game frequently.