The birth of S.L.A.T.E.

 

S.L.A.T.E. is a joke slate created by Maxwell Kappes in the Fall 2012 ASUCD Election. S.L.A.T.E. stands for Student(s) Leading Activism Through Empowerment, which is second only to Friends Urging Campus Kindness for clever backronym (unless of course the Committee on Committees [COC] was also done on purpose). Because only one candidate is running on S.L.A.T.E. it is hardly a slate, but I want to assure you that it is APolitical Machine of One.

S.L.A.T.E. currently has the best track record of any slate, as 100% of all people running on it have been elected. The leadership is now afraid to tarnish such a perfect record by running candidates again, but if no one runs on S.L.A.T.E. who will take ASUCD as seriously as it should be?

S.L.A.T.E. senators are often seen as the most political among those at the table, voting with the slate 100% of the time. It begs the question: where is the independent mind in this political machine? Where is the individuality?

Death of SLATE

Colten Saunders of ASUCD "fame" was the co-creator of SLATE. Following the election, Maxwell believed that he should hold all the power of the slate since he was their only candidate and all. Colten opposed this and created a shadowy board of figures that would instead run the slate, moving Max about like a pawn. Max did as he was told and was soon sick of living such a partisan life, having voted with party 100% of the time.

Colten soon learned of Max's distrust and tried to reason with him over some nice scotch. Unfortunately for him Max was and will remain the only senator who was not driven to alcoholism by senate (in fact he has never even had alcohol) so negotiations were impossible. Colten then brought this to the attention to the board of shadowy figures who unanimously kicked Max out of the slate because of his lack of a drinking problem.

 

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