James being strange (i.e. imitating a drunken Godzilla at church).

James Haile is the overweight guy that rides the black Panasonic Sport 1000 road bike, which he affectionately refers to as 'Sleipnir' (so named for the legendary horse of the norse god Odin), around campus. He is a Mechanical and Aeronautical Engineering Combo Major and is also working towards a minor in Mathematics and Middle Eastern History. He is also known as the 'cross guy' because he usually wears a 6 inch tall cross about his neck and he waits in fear of the day he will fall from his bike only to get his cross caught on something and gets strangled to death. He has sometimes been seen without said cross. Sleipnir, the Panasonic Sport 1000 of legend. The Legendary Smelly Van with Sleipnir leaning up against it. The cross.

Religious Views

He is a Biblical Christian, which means he does not belong to any particular denomination of Christianity. In other words: he's actually a really nice guy and not a blind follower. James also takes some people off guard by the fact that he believes, or in his words knows, that the Jews are still the chosen people of God. He has written an essay on the subject that can be found here. He also believes that the duties of the church can be broken down into five things:

1. The Salvation of Souls. (Expanding the Kingdom of God so that all people may experience the love of Christ.)

2. Home maintenance/improvement. (Purifying and educating those already within the Church. Correcting or rejecting those who do work against the church such as Westboro Baptist Church and abusive priests.)

3. The defense of the Jews and Israel. (They are the chosen people of God and if they are important to Him they should be important to us.)

4. Humanitarian Aid. (Going out into the world to give help and aid to all who are oppressed, sick, hurting, or in want.)

5. Care for the Environment. (The first duty God gave to humanity was to care for the Earth, God has never rescinded that order.)

If you are wondering what the whole 'Jesus Thing' is all about, James would be happy to tell you. If for some reason you don't want to talk to the master of miscommunication, you can read about it and get the gist of what Christianity was SUPPOSED to be in the Bible, specifically the Books of John, Acts and Romans, in that order.


James is known for having a few...peculiarities as well. First being his trinkets. He most often never seen without his blue pop-tab bracelet, giant cross (pictured), a few rings, a donkey key chain attached to his wallet, and a few other various things. Each of these items has their own little story as to why he wears them, but he has yet to relate specifically what they are. He has also said that he has many more trinkets at home that he used to wear in high school and some trinkets that he wears for formal occasions.

The rings of power, for their magical properties, see James' facebook. The blue pop-top bracelet.

James is also known among his classmates for wearing interesting and sometimes thought provoking t-shirts. Some of these are his "Evolution Kills" shirt, his Thundercats t-shirt (the peculiarity of this is that he abhors the Thundercats tv-show), and his "Tokyo Police Cataclysm Division" t-shirt.

Some reports indicate that James has developed an obsession with chewable vitamin C.

James has also gone through several bicycles during his time at UCD. In his first quarter he use what he called a "lemon of a bike." This bicycle repeated fell apart on James as he was riding it leading to multiple visits per day to the Bike Barn to use the tools. At one point the rear wheel 'fell off' while he was riding it (the chain held it on). He took the bike, threw it to the side of the road and ran to class, never looking back. His next bicycle was a piece of junk from the Dixon Wal-Mart. It was a mountain bike of peculiar design, it was the peculiar design that initially attracted James to the bike. This bike too promptly fell apart. In his second quarter at UCD James acquired another bicycle. It was a Fuji Sundevil mountain bike and it served him well for the Winter quarter. However, it was at this time that James started riding his bike to campus from his home in Dixon and he needed a faster bicycle. It just so happened that James had his faster bicycle all along. Sitting in his garage from when he was fifteen was a black Panasonic Sport 1000 complete with a triathlon handlebar attachment, James was just always to short to ride it. And so the love story that continues to this day began. Recently James had a spoke replaced on Sliepnir at B and L, they did a good job.


James is into almost all things Asian. His favorite band is Asian Kung-Fu Generation. He is into old Jackie Chan movies (Police Story, Drunken Master, etc.). He also thinks that Asian girls are the cutest things ever. To quote his sisters, "It's like they are born the ultimate women! They have perfect hair, bodies, are super intelligent, stay young forever, and have excellent fashion sense!"

Other forms of music James listens to are Gothic (Nightwish, Kamelot), Metal (Black Sabbath), Rock (Foo Fighters, AKFG), Classical, and Christian (Steven Curtis Chapman, Michael W. Smith, TobyMac).

He is also an anime/manga fan currently reading 'Black God', 'MoonPhase', 'Trigun:Maximum', and 'Ah! My Goddess!'. His favorite animes are 'FullMetal Alchemist', 'Trigun', 'Cowboy Bebop', 'Last Exile', 'The Meloncholy of Haruhi Suzumiya', 'Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann', 'Hyper Police', and 'Ah! My Goddess.'

Lord of the Rings, the Chronicles of Narnia, medieval tales, and Nordic myths are some of his favorite literature. He also has memorized the Futhark and can write and read it.

He is also very interested in computers, but has been unable to play any games since college started. Yet he has tried to keep up to date on certain things. He has built all of his computers himself, with the exception of his ex-Laptop (ph34rb0t), and his current creation is a 64bit AMD ASUS machine named Bodicea (after the warrior queen of England who united the clans and drove out the Romans). ph34rb0t has recently deceased; his CD drive ceased to function and serious slow downs incurred. A new as yet unnamed laptop is in route for the new school year.

James reads many webcomics regularly including, but not limited to: Applegeeks, 8-bit Theatre and Questionable Content.


He is also one of those persons that should have been a writing major. He writes two blogs, The Sheehy Brothers Adventures, and The Weekly Mold Update. The first is a fictional continuing story of the fantasy/sci-fi/supernatural genre involving many of James' friends from high school in a parallel universe. The second is a more personal blog that contains a few of James' rants about life, the universe, and things that really "annoy the crap out of [him]."


James has been quoted as saying many odd and interesting things, here are a few:

"Que crapo?" (James' attempt at saying "What the crap?" in Spanish.)

"Why can't I major in something I can do? Oh yeah...money." (The reason James' isn't a writing major.)

"Newton and Leibniz had two children, one son, one daughter. The son was Applied Math and the daughter was Calculus. Calculus grew and became more refined and beautiful while Applied Math was beaten and ignored as a child and ultimately grew up to be a deformed and incomprehensible old man in a nut house." (Pretty self-explanatory.)

"The true sign of a talented writer is that he will not only have the humility to accept suggestions, but that he will also have the bravery to reject stupid suggestions." (On writing.)

"I always try to look at both sides of the coin, because unless you know both just as intimately, how can you be sure you're right? And sometimes, when you actually take the time to look at both sides, you find out that they are the same!" (On arguments.)

"I would take an honest atheist over a fake Christian any day." (On self-righteousness.)

"It's like a woman, it seems simple, but the more you get into it you realize too late that it is alarmingly complex." (On probability and statistics. Side note: James enjoys the fact that women are complex, this is in no way intended to be sexist.)

"Revenge is a dish best served with lead and fire." ('Nuff said.)

"Oh...That's barftastic." (James saw something nasty in the woodshed.)

"Holy Crap, and I do mean HO-ly crap."

Please feel free to post any James quotes or sightings.

A few of James' favorite quotes from his friends:

"Oh yeah right there, right there, keep going, oh, it's coming out." -Matt Smith (totally taken out of context though.*)

"The power of Christ FORGIVES you!" -Brett (a parody of the famous line from 'The Exorcist': "The power of Christ COMPELS you!")

*Context: Trying to align a water jug in the cooler.


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2007-07-21 20:15:11   Hey, great page, brother! May the Lord bless you! —RichLindvall